Ready to Quit??? Failure?? Done with the Run??

I've run 4.4 Miles in 3 of the last 8 days    13.2 miles.    None of them were enjoyable.  None of them were fun.  I've wanted to quit during every single run.     Awhile back ...after several years of having to make myself run and exercise I had finally reached the point of enjoying it...of missing it the days that I didn't run.   I'm no longer at that place.   A month and a half of being sidelined with a broken toe and then a bunch of excuses and a month long cold---and I'm no longer enjoying it.  During every run that I've gone on to restart the process I've wanted to quit.....to throw in the towel and just give up on the whole thing.    Yet I keep trying...  My OCD that once drove me to keep stats on my runs and other exercises has let me down.  Depression with my job  has overpowered and helped me to fail in my goals.  You would think having a blog about it would help ---but even that failed to keep me on track.   My Virtual Run to Canada became a crawl.    So where to go from here???   Do I quit?   Do I write the whole thing off as a failure??? Or do I recommit and set new goals???  During this time of exercise failure that I fell off the wagon I still held on to the tail of the wagon like Indy at the end of Raiders......Now it is time to pull myself back on the wagon.....   There will be days that  I will still want to quit.....Every run over the next couple of months will be difficult and during each one I will go through a thousand thoughts of wanting to quit and give up.....But I guess during today's run I've decided that I'm not going to quit.    I'm setting goals for 2013 and hoping to kick my OCD back into a good cause.
It will be a struggle again .....it will be a fight,  but I will win.
2013 will be the Year of Brad......and not FAT by 42.

First up while everyone is sleeping in on January 1st and nursing their hangovers and before they have even made their resolutions that they will not succeed in for 2013  I'm  going to do my first challenge for 2013..........13 for 2013.......I will run 13 miles on the first day of 2013......and will then set on a plan  (whether I like it or not)  to run at least 5 days a week  at least until swim season.

Virtual Run to Canada Update

November Run  Date unknown   3.3 Miles

December 15th  4.4 Miles

December 22nd   4.4 Miles

December 25th  4.4 Miles

December 29th  4.4 Miles

477.8  Miles so far  in 2012

Virtual run to Canada since  Feb 14  2011   1363.7  

78.4 miles to Canada

Daily Stats 4.4 Miles Saturday 0ct 27th

I should change the title to the Reluctant runner.....I just haven't been able to motivate myself post broken toe to get back into full swing......Had to force myself to run this afternoon....and it felt good to be running even if the run itself didn't feel good........Just say no to HE Fat......

Oct 13th  3.3 Miles

Oct 27th  4.4 Miles

456.9  Miles so far  in 2012

Virtual run to Canada since  Feb 14  2011   1342.08  


99.3 miles to Canada

Daily post 4.4 Miles Thursday Sept 20th

After the broken toes derailed my efforts....I slacked off for a bit......Sure I did some swimming but not enough....And Fear kept me from starting up my runs again....Fear of my toe not healing properly.....Well I finally made it back and just in time.....It is so much easier not to exercise and I was falling back into that lazy attitude that made HE FAT possible.....So I back and boy that first day back feel like a first day back....

Thursday Sept 20th

449.2  Miles so far  in 2012

Virtual run to Canada since  Feb 14  2011   1334.38  


107 miles to Canada

3 Miles in the Pool Easier than I thought...Challenge completed.

Brad's Aquaman challenge is complete..  (No I didn't go out into the ocean and try to talk to the fish.).....

This year's fitness challenge was Aquatic in nature do to the broken toe......A 3 Mile swim in the pool.....(480 lengths)...It was a mental hurdle....The number was intimidating---you know when you are 10 lengths in and still have 470 to go......But with the help of some surf tunes on the swim headphones and a good attitude the challenge went smooth.   I love swimming....If I had my own pool I think I would just swim 2 miles a day  and put the running shoes out to pasture.    I'm going to take advantage of the my folks pool this week while they are out of town this week  (if I don't wake up with incredibly sore shoulders in the morning that is)......A week of hard core swimming sounds great...If I was rich and had my own pool and didn't have to work....I feel like I could do this 5 times a week.  Then I might actually look like Aquaman  (without the lame outfit of course)

So onto the next challenge.....I've done a fitness challenge each of the last 3 years as I put He Fat in his grave.....The first year was the Stud Ironmen  (from Jr Lifeguard days) Last year the 13 miles and a slice of cheesecake and today the 3 mile Aquaman challenge........

What should the next challenge be???  Help me decide....give me some suggestions???

I'm thinking maybe a Run swim run........1 1/2 miles in the pool  followed by a 10 mile run and  then another  1 1/2 miles in the pool.......Basically a 10 and 3...  What do you suggest?

Brad's Aquaman challenge!

2 years ago I did the old Jr Lifeguard  Stud Ironman as a fitness challenge to prove that I could still do it........It was a great success.

Last year it was 13 miles and a slice of cheesecake....It was so worth that piece of cheesecake and Kim had tricked me after an offhanded comment about how I could run 13 miles without trainingWell this year---I'm still recovering from my stupid broken toe....

So this year my fitness challenge is  Brad's Aquaman challenge....This Sunday  3 miles  in the pool.....   3 Miles ---I know I can do it.....The challenge will be all mental.....after all it is  480 lengths in the pool ......That is a big number and might be intimidating to count that high.


But I can do it and then hopefully in a couple of weeks I can go back to running again.
The pool is calling ... 3 Miles it says........Make your own fitness challenge....Something to strive for.

Waiting to Run again is the hardest part (injury update)

Waiting to run again is the hardest part..  4 to 6 weeks seems like an eternity!   I'm antsy.....I'm ready to get back out there and run again.   But I'm being extra careful....I want to make sure my toe is fully heeled before I get out there again.    So I wait in some virtual town outside of Seattle on my virtual run to Canada.

The waiting isn't easy.  It took me at least 1 1/2 years of having to make myself run  to get HE FAT in shape again.   There were so many days of not wanting to run -but making myself do it anyway. And then a break through...I finally got to that stage where I no longer had to make myself run....where if I didn't run for a couple of days there was something inside me telling me to get back out there again.   I craved it --just like Disneyland---just like the newest movie or TV show that I wanted to see.......(Just like Chocolate or something sweet at the end of the day).   And now I have to wait.     I'll give it one more week.....One more week for the torn ligaments to heal and the broken bone to settle... for I fear to quick of a return could prolong the injury or worsen it.  Today I will hit the pool instead....I've really been slacking since the broken toe and not doing much of anything....as I wait and wait and wait......I need to get back to running .... I have podcasts to listen to and running is my time to listen to them...

Broken Toe derails Virutal Run to Canada

I tripped and stumbled and almost fell on a 3 mile run last Sunday.  I didn't think much of it at the time.   A couple of days later  my big toe began to ache and so I figured I'd just take a couple of days off and then lace up the shoes and get out there to finish my virtual run to Canada......Well now it is Sunday morning and as of last night I could barely sleep my stupid toe hurt so much.   The virtual run will have to be put on hold until it heals.  I'm currently hobbling around the house on the side of my foot and I don't want to shamble to Canada like some extra on the Walking Dead so He Fat Virtual Fit club is on hold because of one stupid like toe.

Daily Stats July 22nd 2012 Virtual Run to Canada

Sunday July 22nd   3 Miles 

444.8  Miles so far  in 2012

Virtual run to Canada since  Feb 14  2011   1329.98  


111 miles to Canada